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7-11: Beware the Cheeseburger Stick

That cheer you heard rising from lower Park Avenue? Oh, just the sound of a thousand summer thirsts being quenched by that most delicious of icy treats. Yes, friends, relieve those sweaty brows and thank suburbia, because the 7-11 at 23rd and Park has finally opened! But while summer Slurpees are certainly a welcome addition to any 'hood, what to make of the rest of the menu? A Curbed operative files this no-star review:

Every 7-11 since the beginning of time has served "roller dogs" -- hot dogs cooked and gently turned on metal rollers, like you see in movie theaters. Since they already had the equipment, 7-11 has developed an array of other items (can't really say "food") that can be cooked and held that way. I know they've had this stuff in those Big Square States for some time, but I've never seen things quite like this in Manhattan. They're mostly like Hot Pockets, but the dimensions of toilet paper rolls, like a pizza stick and a burrito stick. It all looks quite terrifying, and I'm not that picky of an eater. The most frightening is a cheesebuger, stick-like ground beef, apparently with cheese somewhere inside plus a few onion chunks in evidence. Think of the oddest thing you've ever seen in the diviest basement restaurant in Chinatown. The cheeseburger stick looks more revolting.Sounds deeeeelish. But change the name to Slurpee Shack and watch the crowds gather.
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