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Williamsburg Denied a Merciful, Pain-Free Death

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When the Toll Brothers marched into Williamsburg like an invading army of clueless Redcoats, they foolishly tried to do things their own way. The message was all about being grown up, getting a dog and spawning. How un-Williamsburg. For the new luxury 125 North 10th development?on a very busy strip of the Upper Burg?Savanna Partners and Core Marketing Group have decided to tinker with an anti-Toll strategy: embracing what's left of the Williamsburg hipster community. The results are slightly more embarrassing than what the Toll Brothers drew up. The full website for 125 North 10th is now live (featuring e-cards!), and, uh, yeah. Check out Scruffy McScruffems over there on the right. But it gets worse. SO MUCH WORSE.

Taking a page from the William Beaver House of old, the marketers have set up a MySpace page for 125 North 10th. Who shops for a condo via online social networking, we'll never know, but the prose has definitely shredded whatever dignity Williamsburg had left:

There’s a creative spark that comes from seeing the breakthrough work of a new artist, or hearing talented musicians lock into a groove, or reading a brilliant line from a visionary poet. You feel more alive for the experience. You can catch the same buzz when you’re in a new home—surrounded by thoughtful design, handcrafted finishes, and all the premium amenities that forge a true community.

In fact, it pretty much reads like a parody, not unlike Williamsburg's seven-star Riviera. Need more color? Mmmk: "Great artists—like your Williamsburg neighbors—have a secret. It’s not enough to have a big idea. It must be constantly refined, down to the smallest detail. We feel the same way about your home’s finishes and fixtures." Creepy obsession with finishes aside, the MySpace page is enough to make Williamsburg's struggling artsy underclass weep. You know, if they hadn't already decamped to Bushwick.
· 125 North 10th [MySpace]
· 125 North 10th [Official Site]
· There Goes the Neighborhood: Burg's 'Next Level' is Here [Curbed]