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The Best Brokerspeak of the Year?

We have to give props to Mark David broker Yocari Lara. Her listings tinker with the usual broker hyperbole, but with this $20k/month Flatiron District rental, she absolutely blows her load all over the Internet. We dig the full-color floorplan (even though it's a bit small), but this may just be the greatest apartment description ever, and we don't want to ruin it for you by tossing up a little excerpt. You'll know why it's so special once you read the whole thing. You'll understand its opulence when your eyes gaze upon the flowery prose. Indubitably ... you'll want to rinse your eyes out with acid.
· Listing: OPULENT 2BR PENTHOUSE - Beauty That's Classically Trained [Mark David]