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CurbedWire: The 5% Nation, Shower Assistant Needed

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UPPER EAST SIDE?Hey, we haven't seen an "Only 5% Down!" sales pitch in a while, but there it is, on an e-mailed invite to a party at 300 East 64th Street. The building's website also has a printable coupon for $5,000 off closing costs. A coupon, people. [CurbedWire Inbox]

NOHO?Licensed brokers are passé! A tipster sends along this Craigslist want ad for someone to show apartments and assist a "busy high-end realty co. president." Except, instead of a show-er, the listing asks for a "shower." Amusing! But we enjoy the rest as well: "I own very busy high-end real estate company that is located at Bleecker and Lafayette in Noho. On top of owning my company, I am also an actor, so between the two careers I have a very busy schedule, which is where you would come in. I need someone who has a flexible day schedule to show apartments (primarily high-end rentals) for me. I am the owner of the company and you would be working primarily with a high-end clientele." [CurbedWire Inbox/Craigslist]