The rumored is now reality. The broken escalators on 14th Street that lead down to the sprawling Union Square subway station have been partially encased in sheetrock, which means that this micro-pocket of Manhattan?with its armies of homeless people, aggressive newspaper vendors and oppressive subway heat mixed with the scent of Food Emporium deli meats?has become even more joyful for commuters. Yay! After all, we wouldn't want to trip and fall on the busted escalators and cause an insurance problem for the Zeckendorfs, so we'll be happy to squeeze onto the narrow staircase that is now being used by oodles of people headed in both directions. And thanks so much for including the caution sign! Those of us who can't afford to live in 15 Central Park West are obviously mentally deficient Neanderthals who would probably just climb right over the barricades and attempt to scale the escalators, despite the metal bars. Thanks for saving us from looking stupid!