After all the news about boutique hotels opening in Brooklyn, here's something that goes back to the days of places where rooms rented by the hour and came with free bodily fluids. The hotel in question is a Sheepshead Bay classic, the Windjammer Motor Inn. Neighborhood blogger Sheepshead Bites went looking for some reviews of the place, and they are, uh, interesting, starting with this literary gem:
For an all too brief moment of rekindled passion, I delved into the wondrous caverns of your nether region, and dug deep to unearth the core of divine ecstasy itself. It had been three months since you left. On this night, you showed up at my door, speaking the language of aged scotch and false promises. I was only too happy to accommodate your deceitful ways. You escaped into the unforgiving chill of a bitter cold Sheepshead Bay night. Leaving me to foot the bill for the room while you did god knows what with god knows who. Through a thinly layered wall next to my bed, I could hear a Russian prostitute bark commands at a john. Darkness swallowed the last remaining light of dusk, and engulfed my room in lonely shadows. I dug my feet into the orange shag carpet and smiled. This was the breakthrough we were looking for. One day...soon, we shall jam in the wind once more.Not everyone is a fan though. For instance, the person that wrote the review titled "A Turkish prison would have been better!":This is the biggest turd hole on the planet. When I opened the door, I knew I was in trouble, there was previous biologicals all over . I slept with my cloths on on towels. I turned the tv. on and it was stuck on channel 33, free porn, usually that would not be all that bad, but in this instance I was so mortified that even that repulsed me. And speaking of thin walls, I had a wake up call with a very loud women at 3 am if you know what I mean. Save your money and sleep in the alley, there will be less germs! I almost forgot the hairy mold growing in the shower.And, then, there was the person that wrote, "I would not let my neighbor's dog spend the night there even if his life was in danger." Now, that's a real Brooklyn hotel option.
· Jammin' in the Wind [Sheepshead Bites]