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Turkeys Taking Over Like They Own the Freakin' Place

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We call your attention to this turkey sighting in Central Park not because, well, it's a turkey sighting in Central Park. After all, been there done that. Nay, we bring it up because it's now clear that we will soon be enslaved by our new feathered overlords or killed off in a tidal wave of excrement. Wild turkeys are now common in NYC thanks to a state-wide effort to build their population, and Parks Commish Adrian Benepe says a flock has commandeered a hospital parking lot on Staten Island: "They have become somewhat of a nuisance, because turkey droppings are much bigger than pigeon droppings, but they seem to be very happy there." And so Phase One?cutting us off from timely medical aid?is complete. [City Room]