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Today in Courtney Love's Townhouse Hunt: Desiring Uma & Billy Joel

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Late last week Courtney Love told us she's close to renting a townhouse in the West Village following the Milla Jovovich debacle, and based on some tweets, in which she makes reference to a wire transfer and appears to bid adieu to the staff at the Mercer Hotel (where she's lived occasionally), that seems to be the case. She almost might be buying the staff lingerie as Christmas/going away gifts, but really, who knows? Isn't that part of the fun? Join us on our latest journey inside the mind of the West Village's most, uh, lively homeshopper. To the "low key twatter!"

Courtney really has her heart set on Uma Thurman's $14 million townhouse on West 9th Street (you know, this one), but that ain't happening. Also, Andre Balazs charges way too much for a pack of cigs at the Mercer. No friends-and-family discount?

We also know where she'll be buying some new bedding.

In addition to expensive linens, Courtney is also a fan of the "Billy Joel divorce house" at 23 Perry Street, but, sorry, word is she's already too late to that party. Also, she prefers the NYT's real estate search tool over StreetEasy. Good to know.

This $11 million apartment in The Greenwich on West 13th Street also caught her eye, but we all know how things turn out when Courtney has to share with others. Let's stick to houses, k?
· @colove1 [Twitter]
· Courtney Love coverage [Curbed]