It's time to make up a bunch of awards and hand them out to the most deserving people, places and things in the real estate, architecture and neighborhood universes of New York City! Yep, it's time for the Seventh Annual Curbed Awards! Today's topic: real estate!
Partylicious Pad Proprietors
Awarded to the apartments that require velvet ropes.
3) The epic 99 Jane Street penthouse where Goldman Sachs Director Richard Kimball Jr. let the champagne flow, perhaps a bit too much. He got the boot, and now the Knicks' Amar'e Stoudemire calls the place home.
2) Dr. Joseph Mirakhor earned the nicknames "Dr. Love" and "Dr. Douchebag" from his neighbors, who took him to court for raucous, pill-popping parties in his 31 West 21st Street loft and convinced a judge to give him only 48 hours to move out. The building's direct elevator access meant the neighbors got a few unexpected visits from Dr. Love's drugged-out guests.
1) The guy who turned a basement condo at 109 Reade Street in Tribeca into a kinky dungeon complete with "fire massages" and a stripper pole. That slide is all it takes to earn the apartment first place.
Celebrity of the Year
She briefly inhabited a "Chelsea Mansion" that came with its own butler. She tweeted her pursuit of a fellow celebrity's West Village townhouse. She lost out at the last second, only to keep on hunting, head held...wobbly. She's our biggest fan, and us, hers. Ladies and gentlemen, Courtney Love. Bask in her glory, and for God's sake, be on the lookout!
Broker of the Year
We could give the award to CORE-turned-Elliman broker Fredrik Eklund for landing a starring role on a reality show, but c'mon, who hasn't done that? Instead we salute him for becoming the first high-profile NYC broker whose career as a gay porn star was outed by the New York Times. Now that's originality!
The Barbara Corcoran Lifetime Achievement Award
Awarded annually to Barbara Corcoran, this year for publicly exhibiting the sharp business skills that helped her build an empire. Outsource, underpay and conquer!
The Michael Shvo Gross Overexposure Award
Awarded annually to that person who wrote themselves into the headlines most frequently in the last calendar year, this year's recipient is once again a thing: the Interstate Land Sales Full Disclosure Act (ILSA). The law may be arcane and oddly named, but it's turned out to be a powerful tool for buyers looking to back out of boom-time condo contracts. Recent successful ILSA users include buyers at 80 Metropolitan, the Brompton, and District. But ILSA is an unpredictable animal, with notable failures in LIC and at the 505.
The Golden Tainties
Awarded to the top apartments singed by scandal.
3) Making its second annual appearance in the Curbed Awards is the ponzilicious penthouse formerly belonging to Bernie Madoff. After PriceChoppage from $9.9 million down to $8 million, the place finally sold this year, to toy titans Al and Patsy Kahn.
2) The $1.625 million condo at 77 Park Avenue purchased by Tiger Woods mistress #1 Rachel Uchitel. She's studying in L.A., so the place is temporarily a $10,600/month rental. Uchitel doesn't need to add the rent to her Tiger hush money, so she's saving it up for a renovation that involves gold grills on the radiators.
1) The Upper East Side's Lux 74 has not one but two apartments tainted by financial scandal, enough to earn it the nickname The Ponzi Palace. Bernie Madoff son Andrew Madoff has a place in the building, and celebrity-scamming money manager Kenneth Starr was dragged out of his triplex's closet by the FBI, leaving behind a private indoor lap pool, a banquet room, and a whiff of scandal against which the neighbors are still wrinkling their noses.
The Not Afraid to Court Controversy Award
Last year this award went to the guy who bashed him with an ice bucket, but this year Kent Swig ascends to the throne. Why? Because after a difficult year of losing properties to lenders, shuttering parts of his business portfolio and flirting with personal bankruptcy, he finally broke his silence to say that, well, everything went according to plan! And how did the rest of the battle turn out, General Custer?
Trump Soho Developers of the Year
3) Donald Trump, for his presidential aspirations, fights and with old men, and Sharpie signature.
2) Tamir Sapir, for?to put it in words the man himself can understand?Tamir Sapir, Tamir Sapir, Tamir Sapir.
1) Tevfik Arif, for his love of the ladies.
Developer of the Year
While most other developers were just trying to keep the lights on in 2010, the Related Companies was still sticking shovels into dirt and threatening to actually move ahead on megaprojects left for dead. The company was also behind one of the year's biggest blockbusters, the Superior Ink condos. But the Time Warner Center is no ivory tower. Related, it turns out, is just like us?fighting off bedbugs and daydreaming about tearing down ugly buildings. You go, girl!
· All Curbed Awards 2010 posts [Curbed]