Welcome to a special Whale Edition of The Brokerbabble Glossary, where we take a word or a turn of phrase that seems to show up in an unreasonable number of listings and decipher its true meaning. If you have any ideas, send them to the tipline. Today's words: Opulent bath.
For reasons unknown, brokers really like to describe bathrooms as opulent. Do they think that the idea of an opulent bathroom appeals to the whales more than, say, an opulent bedroom, or kitchen? Do the two words just seem to go together? Bathrooms are typically the smallest, simplest, and most functional rooms, with little space for extravagance or lavishness. Sure, sometimes you find one with a bidet or some kind of crazy shaped tub. More often than not, though, the opulent bath is just a shower door that somebody Windexed the crap out of.
Now this is an opulent bath. All that fancy marble must have cost a ton. Of course, it also looks like a remarkably cold and grim place, but that's a small price to pay (on top of the enormous price you've already paid) for opulence.
You know it's really opulent when there's a fern.