It's no $114 million Upper East Side townhouse, but this 10-room, stone and stucco-clad mini mansion is very Staten Island-y, and that's worth something. The owners are hoping that that something is $2,885 million. 70 Utopia Court features, among other things, a highly symmetrical marble bath with a chandelier, lots and lots of New York Yankees decals, a pink bedroom (for the ladies!), and a man cave with framed Rocky, The Sopranos, The Godfather, and Scarface posters, as well as a huge aquarium. According to property records, the current owners paid $2.6 million for the house in 2006, so they're not eyeing much of a profit. But, still: Fuggedaboutit! Did we do that right?