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Things one should not do with the Gowanus Canal: 1) Drink its water. 2) Touch its water. 3) Dive into it for a swim. Yet, that it what one crazy person trained scuba diver plans to do this Sunday during a TEDx conference about the super polluted, Superfund waterway. He'll be wearing a special Hazmat dry suit and helmet, from which a head-mounted camera will live stream what he sees, so when the toxic alien creatures emerge from the "black mayonnaise" on the bottom of the canal to eat him alive, we'll all know. [NYDN; previously]